Tartar

Jeremiah Thompson was aware of the risk that he was taking. But he simply enjoyed the taste of rare hamburger far too much.

So acutely aware was Jeremiah, in fact, that he went to some lengths to clarify just how dangerous his actions were. He researched the subject thoroughly. From his studies he came to the conclusion that he was, without a doubt, putting himself at risk; that the rare beef that he was consuming could contain a particular type of E coli that was known to make humans very ill. Jeremiah became frightened, and for the period of a month he began to cook his hamburger meat until it was brown.

But it didn't last. The taste of the brown, dry, overcooked meat was incomparable to that of a juicy rare burger. He disliked it terribly. It began to affect his demeanour. He became grumpy, easily irritable, and despondent among his friends. It eventually got the point that Jeremiah came to dislike the taste so much that he was hardly eating at all.

His friends began to worry about him, as he was becoming quite thin and pale from his lack of nutrition. Finally one of his good friends confronted him. By this point Jeremiah was of greatly deteriorating health. He was verge of starving himself to death. His face was hollow, there were dark shadows below his eyes, and he was beginning to lose his hair; he noticed large clumps of it falling out every morning into his sink.

'Why are you doing this to yourself?' his concerned friend asked.

Jeremiah gave in and confessed. He confessed his hatred of the bland, dry meat that he was being forced to consume. His friend, understanding the predicament that young Jeremiah was in, did his best to console his friend, and after some contemplation of his own, suggested an alternative.

Acting on his friend's advice Jeremiah began to grind his own meat.

He would carefully skin the outer edges of the best cuts of beef, before grinding the rest into a plumpy mass fit for his consumption. This worked well for quite some time, but the beef he was forced to buy was costly, and eventually this unfortunate reality caught up to Jeremiah's pocket book.

Jeremiah despaired. It was clear that he could not continue to purchase such expensive beef. But if he didn't he would starve.

It was in the face of this dilemna that Jeremiah came to his decision. And he decided to let the cards fall as they may. He knowingly took the risk.

So let it not be said of Jeremiah that he did not know what he did. He knew fair well that he took his life in his hands with each and every bite. But Jeremiah made his choice, and that choice was to taste a tender juicy morsel, rather then a lifetime of dried out beef.

- posted by Sigurd5/21/2004 01:32:00 AM